Passive voice issue according to grammarly
is the sentence "He neither likes the Indian culture BEING DEGRADED nor white Americans trying to spread out their culture to other people" correct?
Also, he neither likes the Indian culture being degraded nor white Americans trying to spread out their culture to other people.
I would reorder the words in the sentence, at the very least.
Also, he likes neither the Indian culture being degraded nor white Americans trying to spread out their culture to other people.
In all honesty, though, I would reword the sentence entirely.
He dislikes both the degradation of the Indian culture and white Americans' efforts to spread their culture to other people.
|link comment||edited Jun 06 '13 at 04:38 buffi New member|
In the interests of balance and assuring there is no ambiguity, I would write the sentence as:
"Also, he neither likes the Indian culture being degraded nor does he like white Americans trying to spread their culture to other people."
Please also note that I have deleted the 'out' after spread. It was redundant.
|link comment||answered Jun 06 '13 at 04:34 Phil Kimmins New member|
The sentence is still passive...who's doing the degrading? It should read "He likes neither white Americans trying to spread out their culture to other people nor their degrading the Indian culture." The order has to be changed so there is no confusion as to "their."
|link comment||answered Jun 06 '13 at 04:35 Guida Brown New member|
I agree with those who have suggested completely reworking the sentence, though, assuming the white Americans are the ones who are degrading the Indian culture, which is implied but ambiguous, I would suggest cutting the redundant use of culture. Perhaps something like, "He dislikes (though dislike is a weak word) white American attempts at degrading Indian culture and replacing it with their own." The key is to say as much as you can with as few words as possible. If the white Americans are not degrading the culture, I would suggest that you split it into two sentences to avoid ambiguity.
|link comment||answered Jun 06 '13 at 05:57 TyJBrown13 New member|
The "neither" really does have to come after "likes" in order for the two halves of the sentence to make sense together. What's to be done with the rest of the sentence is more about things like tone or voice than about grammar. The passive voice is generally considered to be weaker than the active, but it isn't incorrect. If "the degradation of the Indian culture" seems awkward or too formal for your purposes, then "the Indian culture being degraded" is all right. I would note, though, that the second half of the sentence is a general statement about Americans' cultural offenses, not a specific reference to their degradation of the Indian culture, thus putting that specific degradation into the context of a larger problem. Assumig that was the writer's intention, any revisions should be careful not to change that sense of it.
|link comment||answered Jun 06 '13 at 11:10 David Hopcroft New member|
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