Punctuation for a detailed list...

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I am breifly listing FedEx Corporation's capital expenditures for FY2012. I am not going into detail on each expenditure, but I do want to list what the company invested in and the amount.

See example:

In fiscal year 2012, FedEx Corporation made significant investments of $1.9 billion in aircraft and related equipment, $638 million in facilities and sort equipment, $723 million in vehicles and fleet equipment, $541 million in information technology, and $230 million in other equipment totaling $4 billion in total capital expenditures.
asked Nov 29 '12 at 22:58 Brandon |Haphazard| New member

1 answer


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I think you only need to add a comma before totaling, but the ending needs a bit of tweaking.  When you are writing a list, there is a comma between each one, which is what you did.  If each piece of the list is complicated or one already includes a comma, then the list is set apart with semi-colons instead of commas to avoid confusion.  Your list is pretty easy to follow, so I would stick with the commas. 

 

The last part is a dependent clause that is not part of the list.  It needs to be set apart with a comma.  However, “totaling $4 billion in total” is redundant. There are a few things you can do here.  You can add the last comma and stick with “totaling $4 billion in capital expenditures.” 

 

You can move the dependent clause and make it part of the beginning of the sentence. 

In fiscal year 2012, FedEx Corporation reported $4 billion in capital expenditures with significant investments… .

 

Another alternative is to make it into two sentences.  Either list the significant investments first, with the second sentence expressing what the total was, or the other way around.  

link comment answered Nov 29 '12 at 23:47 Patty T Grammarly Fellow

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