Please check(Self-edited)

Long time no see. I hope you all are in the best of health and cheer. I am writing this to you to let you know that these days, I have been facing a certain financial crisis in my business. Consequently, I have suffered a big loss. I have been unable to pay interest on borrowings from the banks. I have already taken loans from some other friends as well, but still I am short of funds.

Self-edited: <I am writing this to you to let you know that these days,> I have been facing a certain financial crisis in my business.

"I have been facing a severe financial crunch in my business."
<Consequently, I have suffered a big loss.> I have been unable to pay interest on borrowings from the banks.
"I am finding it difficult even to pay the Bank interest."
I have already taken loans from some other friends as well, but still I am short of funds.
"Despite having taken loans from my friends as well, I am still running short of funds."

Next Para:
So, I am approaching you to give me a helping hand in this critical hour.Please send me a draft for Rs 50,000 at once. I shall repay your amount within 2-3 months, as there are some signs of recovery in the business. This recession is a temporary phase. I shall be ever greatful to you if you do this favour for me and if there is anything that you want me to do in the future, I shall certainly carry it out without a second thought.

Redrafted version: So, I am approaching you to lend me a hand in this critical hour. I wonder if you could make a check for Rs 50,000, which  shall be repaid within two or three months once my business picks up.  Please let me know if you can help. I look forward to hearing from you and hope I can return the favor sometime.