confusing modifiers

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We’ll take advantage of the unique environment New Mexico offers and combine it with the subtler contemplative techniques for all abilities, setting the stage to remove that feeling of constriction we often experience due to the pressures of modern day life. Placed in the right setting and taught the appropriate tools to open the human system, we will also experience a schedule with plenty of free time.

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This works in unison to give one a feeling and an experience where life's demands don't need to dictate our lives.
asked Oct 18 '12 at 23:54 Anna Maria Gonzales New member

1 answer


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I'm afraid I don't quite follow the first sentence.  It's a little long, but only needs a few small adjustments to make it grammatically correct.  As for the second sentence, it's a mess.

 

"We'll take advantage of the unique environment New Mexico offers.  Combining it with the subtler contemplative techniques for all abilities, we'll set the stage to remove the feeling of constriction we often experience due to the pressures of modern-day life.  Creating the right setting, teaching the appropriate tools for opening the human system, and experiencing a schedule with plenty of free time will work in unison to give us a feeling and experience where life's demands don't need to dictate our lives."

 

Always keep with one pronoun type.  Don't mix and match in different sentences.  It's a lot like tense in that regard.  Also, the first sentence just needed to be split up.  It was becoming too cumbersome.

link comment answered Oct 19 '12 at 03:52 Rhydon New member

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