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It was indeed a great pleasure to have received your letter. Father is now better, but his movements are somewhat restricted. Mother's eyesight has improved considerably after the cataract operation. Are you so busy as not to be able to correspond frequently? I am hoping to meet you in the summer vacation.

 

Self-Edited

 

It was indeed a great pleasure to have received your letter. ------This sentence gives the impression that I have only received the letter, but I have not yet read it.

Instead, It was a great pleasure to read your letter.

 

Father is now better, but his movements are somewhat restricted.-------Father is now better, but his movements are  restricted. (somewhat does not make any sense in this context)

 

Are you so busy as not to be able to correspond frequently?----It is too wordy and the sentence is a bit awkward.  "Are you so busy to keep in touch with us? " Is this sentence okay? or How do I restructure this sentence?

 

I am hoping to meet you  in the summer vacation.------I am hoping to meet you/meet with you during/in the summer vacation.

 

Please suggest to me if there are any more corrections.  Thank you in advance.

edited Oct 04 '12 at 18:04 sanjay Expert

1 answer


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It was a great pleasure to read your letter – excellent.

Father is now better, but his movements are restricted – fine.

 

Somewhat does make sense; it means the same as a bit. However, your new version is probably better, because both somewhat and a bit, though perhaps not redundant, are certainly unecessary. Either his movements are restricted, or they are not.

 

Also, I suggest you join Mother's and Father's sentences:

 

Father is now better, but his movements are restricted, and Mother's eyesight has improved considerably since her cataract operation.

 

. . . or at least with a semicolon:

 

Father is now better, but his movements are restricted; Mother's eyesight has improved considerably since her cataract operation.

 

Are you so busy as not to be able to correspond frequently – mess.

Are you too busy to write often?

 

I am hoping to be able to see you during the summer vacation.

I hope to be able to see you during the summer vacation.

(either)

link edited Oct 04 '12 at 18:20 Peter Guess Expert

Great help! Thanks a ton.

sanjayOct 04 '12 at 18:36

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