essay

0

how do i re word this

See example:

This has been shown to give infants the best chance of protection from HIV transmission in settings where breastfeeding is the best option."
asked Sep 08 '12 at 17:23 wally New member

1 answer


1

It is an awkward sentence.  The sentence will be stronger in the active voice.  I don't know what this refers to and would likely avoid using the pronoun.  Let's use XYZ to represent whatever this is. 

 

I'm inclined to suggest changing from to against because it feels stronger to me, but both work.  I think it depends on how XYZ works to protect the baby. 

 

The word choice for best chance and best option is redundant even though you are talking about two things.  To write at a higher level, use a thesaurus when you are tempted to repeat words or can only think of simple words.  There are many words that can replace best and might convey more accurately what you want to say.

 

 

XYZ offers the greatest protection against HIV transmission to infants in settings where beastfeeding is most common.

link comment answered Sep 08 '12 at 18:53 Patty T Grammarly Fellow

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