parallelism

0

How to deal with parallelism

See example:

While the rests, such as the GDP growth and DGP per-capita growth, inflation and money and quasi money has been fluctuated since early 1970 and reach their worse performance in 1997.
asked Apr 30 '12 at 02:38 sri sulistyowati New member

1 answer


1

In addition to faulty parallelism, there are several others changes that need to be made to your sentence. Lets clean those up first.

 

"rests" should be "rest". "Rest" is a plural noun from the start and does not need the "s" added to make it plural.

 

You use a parenthetical phrase --> "such as the GDP growth and DGP per-capita growth, inflation and money and quasi money" that must be set off by commas. You need to add a comma following "money".

 

You need to clean up the series within the parenthetical phrase.  You have a few too many conjunctions ("and") and not enough commas. The article "the" is not needed. You may also be missing a word needed for clarity --> "such as GDP growth, DGP per-capita growth, inflation, money supply (M1), and quasi-money supply (M2)," 

 

Your verb "has been fluctuated" has several problems. First, "has" is singular while your subject "rest" is plural. You need to use the plural "have been fluctuated".

 

"been fluctuated" --> Your sentence seems to want the present perfect progressive verb tense, indicating an ongoing action. The form consists of "has/have" plus "been" plus the gerund form of the main verb --> "have been fluctuating". You can either say "have been fluctuating" or "have fluctuated" but not "have been fluctuated" in your sentence. 

 

The faulty parallelism occurred because your two verbs "has been fluctuated" and "reach" are not parallel -- that is, the tenses used did not agree in number and did not make chronological sense. We fixed the first verb, now the second. "Reach" needs to be the past tense "reached" because the event occurred back in 1997. I would also suggest that "reached" might not be the best word choice. Perhaps "saw".  Either "reached" or "saw" will eliminate the faulty parallelism.

 

"worse" should be "worst".

 

Finally, "while" -- as used here -- is a conjunction meaning "at the same as" and should be used to join another clause.  But there is nothing to join. You can omit "while" without changing the meaning. 

 

"The rest, such as GDP growth, DGP per-capita growth, inflation, money supply (M1), and quasi-money supply (M2), have been fluctuating since early 1970 and saw their worst performance in 1997."

 

Hope this helps.

link comment edited Apr 30 '12 at 05:24 Jeff Pribyl Grammarly Fellow

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