help to fix this sentence correctly please

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how to fix this sentence correctly

See example:

Finally, I started to mature very slowly unfortunately, same time I pause for a moment and thought about my mistakes.
asked Jul 13 '13 at 20:24 Marya Ferman New member

3 answers


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Marya,

 

First, let me see if I understand what you are trying to say.

 

The speaker made a realization which came too late to be of use. ("Finally, I started to mature very slowly unfortunately...")

 

At the time the realization was made, the speaker took a break and reflected on what had happened. ("...same time I pause for a moment and thought about my mistakes.")

 

I feel like this is part of a story in which the speaker has come through a hardship, learned some lesson from the hardship, and is taking a break to think about how things could have been done differently.

 

Not only are the adverbs confusing (finally, very slowly, unfortunately), but also the verb tenses are incorrect. "[s]tarted" and "thougth" are both past tense; "pause" is present tense.

 

What is unfortunate? the slow maturity? the mistakes? the pause?  The way the sentence is punctuated makes this very unclear.

 

I'm afraid there isn't one quick or easy fix for this sentence, but I hope I've given you some useful guidance and not added to your confusion.

link comment answered Jul 13 '13 at 21:20 Neznayou New member
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It seems that the "unfortunate" thing you are referring to is the slowness of the maturity.
It also seems that the maturity is bringing on a self-reflection, that it caused the narrator to pause and think. If my assumptions are correct, I would recommend that this be two sentences. I would rewrite it something like:

 

"I finally started to mature, but the process was unfortunately slow. As I matured, I often paused to think about my mistakes."

link comment answered Jul 13 '13 at 22:43 Calli0pe New member
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As per the Mr.Tim Instruction we Done all the Security Camera Installation. Two fixed camera and three PTZ Camera, we already configure two ptz camera but one more ptz camera we cannot able to configure because this security ptz camera controller configuration not available and very old so if you need the ptz you need to go for the third party vender

link comment answered Jan 31 at 10:56 manikandan New member

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