Is this a good thesis statement or should I add more?
Threats to national security have led to policies that decrease the amount of personal privacy that individuals can expect.
It depends on the full body of what you are writing. We can’t know that. It is often helpful to write the guts before composing the opening and closing paragraphs. It is common to write a generalized thesis statement first, then come back to rewrite it. After you have fleshed out all of the supporting evidence in the body, you will be able to tell if it includes the main points of the paper.
Other than that, I think it is a great sentence. Of course, I am biased since I wrote that sentence in answer to one of your other questions. A plagiarism checker can easily find it - this is a public forum. You should change it.
|link comment||answered Jan 14 '13 at 00:53 Patty T Grammarly Fellow|
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